09.03.08 - China

I’m now settled into the Nanjing life. My apartment is set up, my maid comes everyday and I have a bike that I can ride around the city on. This morning I woke up, checked my emails then called the US a few times about Sami and some banking issues, the set out the door. My bike was right where I parked it, under the bike parking lot awning used by all residents in my complex, and I was off to Nanjing morning rush hour.

The streets of Nanjing are as I remember. Wide and easy to get around on via bike. There are three lanes of traffic, two side lanes designated for bikes and mopeds and a center (2 lane) run for cars. These lanes are divided by a median lined with huge sycamore trees, which really helps with the heat factor. There is a lot of honking and whistle blowing and screetching of brakes. I thought to myself as I rode off to the school this morning – “here I am in my Chinese life.” I’m so enjoying this time around in China, I believe part of it is that I’m not on such a steep learning curve with the language and culture. It helps that I have frequent and easy contact with my family and friends in the US via the internet, and frankly, China is just a lot easier place to live these days.

There are super Walmart style markets all over the city. I went to one yesterday to look at the prices of a new bike, and could NOT believe the amount of consumer goods available. One level was everything from selections of toilet paper to ten different kinds of plastic storage bins. The lower level was a grocery store the size of anything you’d see in the States. The difference of course was that there were hoards of people grabbing at the fresh meat that was being put out for the morning, and the long winding line for the specialty fresh eggs that were being sold at a small kiosk near the front. When I was here last, I had difficulty finding two types of toothbrushes and even that was a huge hassle to buy. Now I just walk right through the check out that scans the bar codes and I’m on my way. Since China is a ‘green’ country there is a cost for plastic bags so they won’t give you one unless you request it. Kudos to them! I used to see piles of burning garbage stacked full of plastic bags. A different place all together.

Well not completely different. I have yet to see a Chinese institution where one has to process something that there isn’t a lot of papers, copies, signing and stamping before one simple task is complete. Yesterday I went to the bank to open a Chinese bank account. I sat down in front of a 2 inch glass window that separated me from the girl behind the counter and passed my passport under a very small opening (only big enough for papers and money to go through) to her.

I sat there for 20+ minutes and watched her process, fill out stuff, take out more papers to process. I signed 3 different papers, she copied my passport, ran my new debit card 7 times, ran the little bank book assigned to my account 3 times through the machine, stamped everything (about 5 different papers) with 4 different chops and while the line behind me grew (because she was the only window open) she ran my card 3 more time and each time I a recording on the speaker would yell out “Enter your PIN number please.” Finally! I had a bank account with 90yuan in it set up. They charged me the steep fee of 10yuan a year to have an ATM card (about 15 cents). I’m good to go now!

Another thing that will always be Chinese is the concept of “face.” It is basically allowing the other person to maintain dignity, even if they have done something to embarrass themselves. An example of this is if you are working with the Chinese you don’t question their work outright, even if it’s completely wrong, even if everyone (including them) knows that it’s wrong. The way to help that person save face is to offer an alternative option that makes them look important and gives them a way out of the situation. We do this too in American culture, but it is constant going on in Chinese culture.

So here’s my dilemma:

My maid, is so dear and she is doing a fabulous job of cleaning the place. She is a widow with a child and she works all day then cleans at night after work to support herself and her kid. She comes everyday to my apartment and sweeps, wipes everything down, cleans the bathroom, takes out the garbage. I don’t know how to act! She wants to wash my clothes as part of her job, but she hand washes. I can’t figure out why she just won’t use the washing machine – and I have a feeling that hand washing is going to beat and stretch my clothes to the point that they won’t ever recover. So, I would rather do my own laundry.

When she came yesterday I was doing my Chinese best to help her save face so I told her I was happy with her work, if she needed anything purchased to let me know, thank you thankyou thankyou…. Then I mentioned that I used to washing my own clothes in America so she didn’t have to work so hard and do that part of the job and I would still pay her the same. She was crestfallen. (who gets crestfallen when they are told they don’t have to hand wash laundry?) She then assured me that she had cleaned this apartment for many years and all the tenants (who have been foreigners) were very pleased with her work. She works very hard to make everything very clean and she’ll use hot water to clean the clothes. After that we both let it go and since there was a pair of fairly sturdy pants in my laundry basket she showed them to me as she was taking them to the wash basin of hot water.
My solution – to help her save face – is that she works M-F about 5-6pm at my place. On Friday night I am going to wash all my whites and whatever else I have hidden away in my secret laundry drawer, and let them dry over the weekend (I don’t have a dryer, just a back patio to hang clothes on). Fold and put them away before Monday and ‘hopefully’ she won’t notice, and if she does I don’t think she will say anything. My clothes that I think can with stand some hand washing on a regular basis will end up in the laundry basket where she draws from. This is how one helps the Chinese save face.

CONFESSION: I held out for 10 days in Asia before committing the regrettable choice of eating at McDonalds. I was just so hungry by 3pm yesterday, hadn’t had lunch, all the lunch shops were closed, no food in the house (except for 3 bottles of watery OJ). It didn’t take much to find my neighborhood store and the next thing you know I’m chowing down on a Big Mac, fries and a Sprite with no ice. They were generous enough to give me 2, instead of the standard 1, packet of ketchup and they even gave me a packet of salt (after much rummaging). I’m going to see how long it takes until the next break down.