bill of health = pool pass

getting a pool pass to nanjing university pool isn't much different than filling out 5 years worth of 1040 forms for the IRS. seen here is my official "bill of health" - the requirement needed before one is allowed to swim in the university pool. it is issued by the university health clinic located just down the street from the main enterance to the campus.

when i first expressed that i wanted to swim for exercise i was informed that i needed to get a blood test in order to get a pool pass. to my american mind this meant going to a qualified dr. and/or nurse, getting some blood drawn and then picking up the clean results a few days later. what a shock to learn that i am not in america! first of all the time to get the blood test is only on M/W/F from 8-10am. the sign advertising this informed me to go to room 422, on the 4th floor. i entered the hot elevator of the clinic that hadn't seen a good floor mopping since the last revolution and i wondered what i would be in for this time in China.

on the way to 422 i stopped a nurse in a not so white and very wrinkled lab coat where to get my blood tested. she told me to go to the 2nd floor. arriving on the 2nd floor i quickly found the station where blood was being drawn. a male nurse stood behind a thick glass with three 1/2 holes cut out right above the counter. the holes are just big enough to stick one's arm through to the other side so that the nurse can draw blood from the other side. everyone standing in line and/or passing by, can easily observe your blood drawing experience. i waited to find out what i needed to do to have this done and when i was finally able to 1/2 yell through one of the holes to ask he said i had to go up to the 4th floor first.

at room 422 the nice nurse behind the very small window of this 'hospital' (that looks as if it came right out of the 30s), gave me a slip of paper and told me that i would need to go down to the 1st floor to pay for the service then come back with that paper before she would give me more papers to be processed. i commented that this was a lot of running around and she agreed.

it was getting a bit warm in the hospital as it was a humid day in nanjing and all the windows of the hospital were open. i packed up to the payment window (there aren't really lines to wait in in China, one just joins the pack) with a few other people and when i had finally pressed my way to the front i shoved my little piece of paper through a very small hole in the window only to have mean nurse throw it back at me and yell "you need to write your name on it!" she then ignored me until i had filled it out and proceed to yell at (and ignore) the guy behind me because she didn't have change for the 100 RMB bill that he was trying to pay with. i dutifully wrote my chinese name and when she had typed everything in she flatly said "33.5 yuan ~" fortunately, i had the exact change. i squeezed my way out of the pressing crowd behind me as the guy with the 100 bill was still standing at the window with bill in hand still being ignored but waiting for a solution.

i waited for the slow elevator again, went to the 4th floor and was handed 3 different kinds of papers and a couple of small pink slips, all of which had to be filled out, stamped and then stamped again. the nice nurse then told me to go down to the 3rd floor for the next step. i didn't understand exactly what the next step was, but i went to the 3rd floor and asked for the department that she had told me to go to. since i didn't understand what i was saying, i'm still not sure what i was being checked for. but i ended up in the 'women only' room, where another nurse in a greying and wrinkled coat shut the door then lifted my shirt to look at my stomach. whatever she saw must have been satisfactory because she signed and stamped my big paper and retained one of the pink slips.

next to the eye exam. i sat down in the office of eye nurse she looked at each of my eyes, barely lifted the lid of one of them then signed and stamped my paper. whew! i passed again. they directed me down the hallway to nurse blood pressure. who took my pressure, listened to all the heart stuff then wrote me an OK on the paper. at this point i thought i had passed so i went downstairs to the blood testing window. nope, not yet! back to room 422.

nice nurse told me that i needed to get a chest x-ray then to come back to her and once i returned she would give me the OK to get my blood drawn. back down to 2nd floor where the male technician was not very happy to take anyone's x-ray but was doing it anyway. other people lined up in the room behind me, no lead aprons just waiting their turn. FINALLY! i had all my stamps and OKs to get the document that would allow the male nurse to draw my blood.

by this time i was hot and sweaty from the humdity and running around ~ and it was only 8:45am! i got in line, or at least a small group, with the others who needed blood drawn and waited while we all watched the person at the window get their blood drawn. yep, everyone just watched over the shoulder of the next patient to see how this was done. my main concern was that the nurse was using never used before sterilized needles, which he was.

finally, it was my turn. i sat down on the little stool at the counter and put my hand/arm through the hole in the window and rested it on a small pile of paper towels (that hadn't been changed since i had arrived that morning). the nurse strapped on the elastic around my upper arm told me to squeeze my hand and asked if i knew chinese well enough to understand all that he was saying. i told him i did. there were several people standing behind me nearly pressing into my back and watching over my shoulder. since i'm not keen on watching my blood be drawn i looked off to the side of me and happened to notice a thin1/2 circle line of blood spattering on the inside of the window that ran from the hole next to me up the glass about 2 feet. at least it was dry i thought.

once my blood had been drawn i took my necessary paperwork upstairs and handed it to nice nurse who told me come back in 2 days and be sure to have a passport size picture with me (as every official document in China requires a passport picture). i left feeling gratified that at some institutions in china the old system of red tape, thick bureaucracy and unhappy workers still exists.

2 days later i picked up my official bill of health and i can now swim knowing that everyone else i swim with has a belly, 2 eyes, clean lungs and hopefully no blood diseases.